Take a deep breath.
And let go.
Let go of all the emotional baggage. Let go of all the likes and the comments. Let go of your stats. Let go of your followers. Let go of fucking arranging the plates. Let go of the lighting. Just. Let. Go.
I had an awakening. It was 8.23 pm, listening to Orange Sky by Alexi Murdoch, reading Essena O’neill’s blog post. I finally realised that social media is taking over me. I’m not doing the things I do for myself anymore. I do them to get “liked” and get “followed”. I’m using my life as “content”. I tilt the plate for 5 more likes. I put a filter on for 5 more. I press my collarbones out to get 10 more followers. I push my legs apart to have 10 more. I have been doing everything in my life according to social media. I go to places that are Instagram worthy. I see the world through a freaking phone screen. I scroll and scroll all day seeing peoples photos and judging my own life. I subconsciously try to make my life seem much better than it actually is. I try to create an image of me living happily, eating good food, traveling and having fun when in fact, just the plain action of “trying” to create it is taking away all the reality in it. We live in such a society that you’re basically nothing if you don’t get a certain number of likes. It’s social suicide not to have Instagram. Is this actually all there is to the world? What happened to watching the sunset without taking a picture of it? Or just going for a run without the whole world knowing about your pace? Can you not just sit back and enjoy the moment without putting it on Snapchat story? Why can’t I actually express my creativity rather than being seem as if I’m doing it?
Does a meal actually exist if you don’t Instagram it? Did my trip actually happen if I don’t snap about it?
I know that I was doing these exact same things up until like an hour ago but it’s never too late to wake up. Just wake up.
Start living your life focused on yourself and yourself only. Don’t wait for others to acknowledge you to prove you exist. Don’t be so dependent on social media to be confident. You’re already fucking perfect. And so am I.
I am not the likes I get. My follower count does not define me.
My obsession with the perfect filter or the perfect cropped angle has been distancing me from my actual passion for photography. I have been taking all my pictures from my Iphone and have barely been touching my actual professional camera. But today I went and printed so many of my actual high quality ones to remind myself that the picture has no value if it’s sitting in my laptop and that you can only see it if it’s real and you can touch it with your hands and hang it on your walls.
That’s why I decided to leave Instagram for a week, and use it only for my blog afterwards. I have so much creativity in me that I feel like I’m limiting myself by being so dependent on social media.
Of course I will still post pictures, but I won’t tell people not to eat until I get a picture or make them take the same photo over and over again because it’s not “good enough”. I can do this, and so can you.
Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. Don’t get lost in societies labels. You’re way more than that.
Focus on yourself.